No Gossip Girl, No Grey’s Anatomy

The writers are still striking which is why I have nothing to write about. Oh, the paradox of our time.

• Jessica Alba is pregnant. Why does everyone care so much? It’s not like she was voted the hottest woman alive or anything. Or was she?

• Britney missed her deposition. I’m beginning to think that her kids are rented and that all of this is really a publicity stunt.

• Mamma Mia! is being made into a movie and starring Merryl Streep, Pierce Brosnan and Colin Firth. This is going to be amazingly British and musical. SO EXCITING! Check out the teaser trailer here.

• Kudos go to Kiefer Sutherland for actually doing jail time.

• And finally for today, Paris Hilton is 24 carats of naked gold. We always said she was made of nothing but money, but she just took it to the next level. She is posing for a campaign put out by the Rich Water Foundation. The foundation is scheming to source water from the icebergs to relieve drought-hit regions. Such a humanitarian… or something.

• (The above was according to The Superficial. I think they lied because Page Six claims it’s for a champagne ad. Now, the question is: which newstrash to believe? I’ll get to the bottom of this. Either way, the photos are super scary and somehow she reminds me of Falcor, the flying dog/dragon from “The Never Ending Story.”) (Am I soooo right?!)